How frustrated have you been regarding the behavior of your mate, your children or your friends in the course of your life. How many times have you told yourself if only their behavior would change how much better my life would be. For a good number of years I felt the exact same way.
When we had our daughter my husband was not the father I thought he should be. He was not very attentive and was not home much to spend time with our child. For the first 3 years I constantly tried to change his behavior. I thought I had the right answers and he should live by my rules regarding parenthood. All I achieved was tension between us and total frustration within myself. His behavior didn’t change because he was on a different journey than I.
We went to counseling and what I discovered is that the only person I truly had control over was me. I could only be the best mom I knew how to be and I had to let him be the dad he thought he should be. I have come to believe that when we are born all the people we need to help us fulfill our journey/purpose have already been chosen to come to us to help us with our growth. I am the person I am partly because of the parents I was given. My daughter is the person she is because of the parents she was given. It is up to each of us to take the negatives and turn them into positives to move forward and gain fulfillment.
Once I learned this valuable lesson my growth has been amazing and I have achieved inner happiness. I also made my husband happy because he could always just be himself and know I loved him no matter what. Not to say there were no disagreements and occasional frustration. I just learned to put it in its proper place.
When you change your behavior the behavior of how people around you changes. This happens 100% of the time. Concentrate on your journey and know that everyone around you is on theirs.