Last night George and I went to our favorite watering hole for a bite to eat and some cheer. Usually we encounter friendly bartenders eager to interact and receptive to our needs. However, this bartender did not make eye contact, did not smile and was slow to acknowledge our presence and take our order. I asked him if he was having a bad day and he mumbled something I could not hear and continued with his job. He was argumentative with some of the servers regarding drink orders and overall appeared to be miserable. I told George our bartender is not happy with his job. The sad part is his body language and demeanor was confirming his perception of his job. He could not see that with a change of mindset he could change his immediate environment.
I learned this lesson many years ago. There was a time I was very unhappy with my job. I felt overworked, underappreciated and clearly did not get along with some of my coworkers. I was considering a transfer to another department and even came close to giving notice. However, the benefits I received outweighed my discontent. I made the decision to stay and at the same time also made the decision about how could I turn the situation around and make this a place I wanted to work and enjoy coming to work. I started to change my mindset and come in each day looking for positive situations to focus on. Most days I was successful, but some days I fell short. After some time I found contentment in my job. I also used this same technique when my marriage seemed unfulfilling. I looked within myself and found contentment within me. I discovered it was always my responsibility to make myself happy. This responsibility never falls to another person, place or thing.
When my husband died I was beyond heartbroken, but after some time I looked within myself to find what would make me happy and content. I then started behaving my way back to happiness and contentment.
I am happy to report my life is exactly what I want it to be. I have been blessed to love again. I am surrounded by people who care about me. My home is a loving home and my scenic views take my breath away. My days are full with enjoyable activity. I love taking care of my Georges, my home and being able to create beautiful crafts. I have raised a beautiful and successful daughter, whom I love with all my heart. I perceive my life as blessed and will enjoy this third act of my life.
What we perceive our life to be is what it will be. We will behave and react in a way to affirm our perception. If we want circumstances to be different we must look within ourselves to find the answers we seek. So the next time you are unhappy with your surroundings try looking within yourself and answer this question, “What am I doing to create this environment?”
Reality is merely our perception of what goes on around us.